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Han Yixian
yeah im 21. SO WHAT!
29-09-1988
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What i am up to after finishing my TP job
Monday, January 31, 2011


Now with facebook blogging seems like a thing of the past but HEY! there are somethings that are more private that i dont wish to share with that many people. And THERE! Im tasked to make a wedding dress for a photoshoot for my cousin. Like a prelude to her actual photoshoot. Well, beats watching TV and eating chips all day right?


AND I LOVE YOU MR. SMITH.

Don't get so worked up~ Its just me

the weirdest feeling ever
Friday, January 28, 2011

It feels like primary 4 when i sat beside geok ting. It feels like primary 6 with yong huan. hmmmm... wonder wonder...

Don't get so worked up~ Its just me

[SHINee] Honey Pot Full HD
Sunday, January 23, 2011


i dunno what u are saying but omg SOO FUNNY

Don't get so worked up~ Its just me

Cooking is joy!
Saturday, January 22, 2011







To get to this state, i had to reduce a bottle of red wine to like 1/5 of its original volume to get the essence and rid the alcohol. Had to add beef, herbs, spices and other stuff like carrots. Damn the whole pot cost so much but yet produce like maybe 100ml of liquid only!! Then add roux and beef stock to make the sauce.



Oysters with cheese on it!! :DD Recipe from Mr Yun Guang.



Happy customer!!



Pardon the background hahaah. no time to arrange nicely lar!

Feels so good to cook for my family. I used to always bake this and that but seem to stop after i entered the Army. Tonight was specially prepared to thank them before i fly off to adelaide. Abit of mixed emotions here and there but going there is definitely for the better. It will be my own personal adventure in everyway. Living independently, self discipline, exploring relationships, be my own emotional support. I guess thats how we learn and grow. 23 years old already this year and not getting any younger, its time to take care of not only yourself but others around you.

Sidetrack: I think i somewhat found an answer. Though im quite disappointed after hearing the truth from another person. Alot of words: manipulative, cold fish hahahaha But i guess it doesnt matter anymore. And for the first time, because i don't want it to matter anymore. I don't even want to squeeze out some time to swear at you. Oh yes, truth does hurt at times. But im glad my heart has finally closed his doors on you. With a smile. :) Good bye fake sheep.

Don't get so worked up~ Its just me

你最近还好吗
Monday, January 17, 2011



Earlier on when i was recording something on keyboard for my colleague. Played a recording of your singing and playing of piano by accident. I didnt know i still had it in my phone. You know what, i threw away the stuff i used to collect; the tickets, concert ticket, the little things. All kept in the salmon mentaiko bento; the first dinner you bought for me. I deleted all the smses on the very night so i could get some sleep, i really needed it. I started a blog then deleted it, lived in denial for awhile. I block all the sources of newsfeed, i avoid places. I bury myself in work and social.

After forgetting your phone number which i remember by heart, after eating in the same places, with the same order, even failure to cry when the director asked me to, i thought i had went back to the me before you. Just one hug and i allow myself to drink so much i couldnt recognise. Just one audio file and everything i seem to be working for seems futile. Sometimes i feel so trapped. No one to warm my left hand when the car air-con gets cold. No one to feed me gummy bears. No one to tell me its alright to be a blur on the roads. No more waking up to morning greetings and no more ending the day with you. I promise myself that this is a new year i won't let 2010 affect now and the future. I wont even talk about you anymore in front of my friends. I took forever and i still cannot forget her. For you, i dont know how long it will take. Maybe like what Daniel Gottlieb said, we have to learn how to live with these feelings of longing. I have alot to deal with already. Can I just please have one less feeling of missing.

1...
2.....
3......

Breathe~

眀天会更好, 明天的明天会更更好,明天的明天的明天会更好。 I believe.

Don't get so worked up~ Its just me

asian beauty
Sunday, January 16, 2011



I thought tonight i wanna blog about how great SPRUCE, my brunch was, how nice this t-shirt i bought from pull and bear was. Then i came across this photo and i thought about women, and the perception of beauty. But im so dead tired and i got work tml! OMG. shall write my article on the bus.

Soon i promise!

Don't get so worked up~ Its just me

Dreaming
Saturday, January 15, 2011


Just watched this movie crazy little thing called love. Reminded me of the younger school days. Friendship, wanting to be cool, crushes. Haha. Oh dont we all miss the good old days?!

Well, i do indulge in a little fairy tale here and there. hahaha but right now.. hmmmm its a little too good to be true

Don't get so worked up~ Its just me

goody are u going to desert me?
Tuesday, January 11, 2011

This is my last month working at TP and i finally whip out the discipline in me to exercise and actually eat wiser. Just that i realise as i grow, i also get more disappointment in mankind. Like you can put in alot of effort for work and its just never enough. That you stop helping upon sight, but think first if you got the time. Its just times that i see kind souls getting taken advantage of or sometimes im the victim. I feel so angry at myself for not being able to do something about it because im powerless. I know money can lend you a certain authority. For example, you can send a lawyer letter as and when you like. You have that higher degree of influence cuz you now have a bigger share of the pie.

I also know that money cannot get me what i really want. Money can accelerate processes but most definitely cannot take you back in time. For that reason i didnt sign up for the rat race. But i hope my beliefs can get me a ticket to the end point.

Today, my friend's car was hit by a van. As a concerned friend i asked if she was alright. She told me what happened and specifically mentioned that the uncle "thank" her for causing him to lose his job. I know she will be damn affected as the kind of person she is. So i told her that if its not her fault she should go ahead to fight for compensation without any sympathy what so ever. LIKE STOP LETTING OTHERS STEP OVER YOU!!

So later in the evening, still fuming mad, i sent her this,

No need call back just wanna tell you to get your aunt or someone fierce to deal with it. Don't care what he lose job all these if is he's fault. Hao xin mei hao bao one!!!


Then suddenly, i think, what if the uncle has kids to raise. New year is coming, Losing job at new year? What a "happy" new year would that be? However, these thoughts were quickly pushed aside by this: SO NICE FOR WHAT?! ITS A DOG EAT DOG WORLD!!!

I still can recall when i was working in V tearoom with Amy. There was once we were walking. This old woman had her trolley all toppled over and none of the by passers would stop to help. My first reaction was to chiong and help her even though it was all rag and bone stuff. We even helped her all the way to her house across 2 streets.

Now? i guess my devil has the bigger weapon.

Don't get so worked up~ Its just me

OH! OPEN HOUSE 2011
Sunday, January 9, 2011






Went to art exhibiton with jasper. Always go with him cuz apparantly like no one gives a shit about the art scene in Singapore. Also, like me, he dare to voice out like opinions about the art installations. A reasonable art argument i would call it. Tonight's installation was nice. Totally artgraded (upgraded artistically) since last year. LOVE IT!

Do buy your tickets at marine parade library

For more info, here are the details at,

http://www.facebook.com/ohopenhouse?v=wall

tickets are 10 dollars and the last tour is at 730pm. Do reach there earlier!!! All you have to bring is 10 bucks and an OPEN MIND.

CHEERS :D

Don't get so worked up~ Its just me

thats why




Gek teng said i missed out a very big part of my 2010 entry. That is you. The one i could throw everything away for. Well, mu answer to gek teng is I had my starbucks and im not looking back. What for i keep mentioning it.

Don't get so worked up~ Its just me

New year resolutions!
Sunday, January 2, 2011

New year marks a new start and i shall not live in the past anymore. My new year resolution is simple.

MOVE FORWARD. FULL SPEED AHEAD!!

Don't get so worked up~ Its just me

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